Overdue predicting time

Hi peeps, been a while. Sorry about that. I swear I planned to follow up that last post, but I got busy, then I got sick, then I just plain forgot. See, I like to think I’m awesome and don’t need to write things down to remember them – the truth being closer to I’m so forgetful when it comes to agendas that I forget to even write things down – and sometimes things just slip my mind. Or I completely and utterly forget. Whatever.

Anyway, I am back, for a little bit. I won’t make silly promises such as I’ll be updating regularly, until I actually am updating regularly, but for now, here’s what’s left of that last post.

Tennessee predictions:

Sept. 11 (1-0) – Oregon: Loss. I don’t know how many of you paid attention to last week’s college football scores, since there were maybe three legitimately interesting games on over the course of three days, but Oregon beat the ever-living daylights out of New Mexico. Granted, UT-Martin found itself in a similar situation against the Vols, losing 50-0, but there’s one key difference: New Mexico is an FBS team in a legitimate conference (MWC, though the Lobos are bottom feeders), while UT-Martin is an FCS team that finished with a losing record in 2009.

Also, Oregon did this with an unproven starting quarterback in Kenjon Barner and second-string running back Darron Thomas. Add starting back LaMichael James into the mix at Knoxville, and you get about what Vegas predicts: a 14-point line in favor of the Ducks, 3,000 miles from their home field.

Final score: 42-20

Sept. 18 (1-1) – Florida: Win. I’m going to get gutsy here. I am by no means convinced that the Vols even have a real shot at finally beating Urban Meyer, but after watching the Pouncey-Brantley exchange fail an astonishing 14 times out of 40 shotgun snaps, I really think the Gators have the ability to allow anyone to beat them. The Vols will be the first legitimate opponent the Gators face, and Meyer is confident, possibly arrogant, enough to believe he can get away with continuing to try to fix the team’s obvious shotgun problems instead of opting for the safer game plan of sticking John Brantley under center.

Sept. 25 (2-1) – UAB: Win. I would love an explanation as to why in the world the Vols have a nonconference foe on the fourth Saturday of September. It’s bad enough they scheduled an FCS opponent this year, but the middle of the schedule should be reserved for conference and tough nonconference opponents only. Either way, there’s no question about this. The Blazers return to Knoxville for the first time in two years and without one of the best weapons in their history: Joe Webb. This will probably wind up as no more than a great opportunity to work out any flaws coach Derek Dooley sees in his team before it hits the road for arguably the hardest stretch of games in the country this year.

Oct. 2 (3-1) – LSU: Loss. Any confidence the Vols may have gained during the month of September is going to be sucked away in the Bayou. LSU looked shaky against a much-depleted UNC team Sunday, but the Tigers are still one of the better teams in the SEC, they will be playing at home, and defensive coordinator John Chavis gets his first chance at exacting revenge for the way he and the rest of Fulmer’s staff were unceremoniously ousted in 2008. The Vols should put up points, but turnovers and an inability to hold off what seems to be a much-improved Jordan Jefferson-led offense will be too much.

Oct. 9 (3-2) – Georgia: Loss. The Vols have a knock for being a huge buzzkill to the Bulldogs during any promising season, but that won’t happen this year. I’ll be honest: I haven’t heard much about Georgia this year, but I know that, even without A.J. Green, the ‘Dawgs have a formidable offense, and their defense should be good enough to keep the Vols offense away from the end zones enough to ensure a victory.

That being said, don’t be surprised if Tennessee hits its stride here. The only real questions the Volunteer offense has are how Matt Simms can handle heavy pressure and how well the highly touted but highly inexperienced offensive line can gel in a couple months. Far more questions lie on the defensive side of the ball, but a strong offense will be the key to the Vols walking out of the Hedges with a win – but don’t count on it.

Oct. 23 (3-3) – Alabama: Loss. It’s nice that the Vols get a reprieve in the middle of their four-game road stint. Unfortunately, it’s to host the defending national champs. The Crimson Tide only return roughly half their starters from last year, but those starters, like Greg McIlroy, Mark Ingram and Julio Jones are invaluable. Don’t expect the Tide to walk into Neyland Stadium undefeated, but don’t expect them to walk out with an extra loss, either. The score will be closer than the last time Alabama visited Knoxville, and there should be significantly more passion, but that’s not enough to win a game against a simply better team.

Oct. 30 (3-4) – South Carolina: Win. The great thing about the Gamecocks under Steve Spurrier is that expectations are always high, and they always fail. South Carolina is notorious for not being able to finish down the stretch, and, like I said earlier, expect the Vols to have found their stride at this point. Tennessee’s largest flaw this year is its raw inexperience and lack of depth. Both of these can be overcome with experience and hard work. Couple that with the fact that Tennessee simply has more talent than USC, and the Vols should be able to stop their losing skid in Columbia, S.C.

Nov. 6 (4-4) – Memphis: Win. If what Mississippi State did to Memphis during the opening week is any indication, Memphis’ hopes of a successful season were a little bit overstretched. The Tigers have, as of right now, no legitimate threats on either side of the ball, as well as a fresh coaching staff with less experience than Dooley’s gang. It won’t be a cakewalk, but the Vols should be able to run their in-state mark to 2-0.

Nov. 13 (5-4) – Mississippi: Win. This is where I’m glad I didn’t sit down to write this until today. In the last week, I’ve changed opinions on Ole Miss more times than I can count. First Jeremiah Masoli was suspended for a year. Then he won his appeal. Then the Rebels just flat collapsed against Jacksonville State. Then I heard Jacksonville State’s quarterback being interviewed. OK, so that last one didn’t change my opinion; it was just funny. His voice would’ve been more at home in a Rebels uniform than in a … well, I don’t exactly know what JSU’s nickname is.

Anyway, this is not a team set up for success this year. Even without their fourth-quarter collapse, the Rebels looked shaky at best against a sub-par FCS team. Add to that fact that every Vol remembers the pounding Dexter McCluster and Co. laid on the team in Oxford last year, and the Rebels have a steep mountain to climb if they want to pull off a second straight win against UT. And with this, the Vols will find themselves unexpectedly bowl eligible with two weeks left to play.

Nov. 20 (6-4) – Vanderbilt: Win. Don’t know if any of you watched Vandy play Northwestern Saturday, but the Commodores made a decent-at-best Wildcats team look like an efficient machine. Vandy wasn’t exactly hammered, but the game was never close either. With Bob Johnson’s offseason resignation, the Commodores are as shaken up as the Vols, and they have absolutely no talent to make up for it. Enjoy this game, Vols fans, because this is where it gets interesting.

Nov. 27 (7-4) – Kentucky: Loss. Yup, you read that right. I laughed when Zac, our editor-in-chief marked the Wildcats as a loss in his preseason predictions for our paper. Then I watched the Wildcats throttle Louisville.

Let me be perfectly clear here: Randall Cobb is. a. freak. And he’s not even the best player on the team. That distinction goes to Derrick Locke. The scary thing about Kentucky is that the team can completely redefine the word ‘Wildcat.’ Both Locke and Cobb can line up under center – although Mike Hartline is no slouch as QB – and Locke can actually throw, giving them a stupid number of options on offense. Along with that, Joker Phillips, former offensive coordinator, seems perfectly capable of filling Rich Brooks’ shoes. Basically, it doesn’t really matter what the Vols do, because the Wildcats are going to score, and they’re going to score a LOT. If Tennessee is going to stand a chance, they’ll have to match the Locke/Cobb duo every touchdown of the way.

Alrighty, there’s my predictions for the year for the Vols. I’ll try to start doing weekly predictions for Top-25 teams as well, but we’ll see how consistent I am with that. Also, I hope none of you have made plans for Thursday night, because there’s this little thing called the NFL, and it’s starting its season that night. It’s only the single most important date of the fall.